Sequels

I've been listening to a band called Autopilot Off recently. They fucking rock and they entered my life the same way some of my all time favorite bands did in the past. Goldfinger, System of a Down, Less Than Jake, Bodyjar, Cauterize, Crush 40, and Autopilot Off were all introduced to me via the video game. When ever I think about certain bands, such as the bands I listed above, sometimes I get brought back to the game that exposed me to that music. In which game did I really learn about Autopilot Off? SSX 3.

So I turned on SSX 3 again for the first time since the middle of the summer today because I wanted to listen to some Autopilot Off and maybe because it just snowed the other day and it was appropriate. After a whole bunch of racing and freestyle runs, I started thinking something rather treasonous:

SSX Tricky or SSX 3?

I think SSX 3 is a better game than SSX Tricky. There. I won't be clever and wait until the end of the whole fucking post before I come out and say it. I love both SSX Tricky and SSX 3, but I prefer SSX 3 over the former. The main question that I ask myself is the following: Why is it that SSX Tricky is the game that I find more people talking about when I feel that SSX 3 is a better game? Unfortunately, I don't have the energy to actually determine the answer to that question, but what I can do is compare the two games so you guys can decide for yourselves. SSX Tricky or SSX 3?

So here we go. The SSX series is a series of snowboarding racing games made by EA Big. There are several installments in the series, including 3 for the Nintendo Gamecube and at least 1 for the Wii (I don't claim to be an expert on Wii....yet). Based on the conversations I have with my friends both at home and at college (so you can tell I am getting a really wide range of people here), it would seem that SSX Tricky is the more popular game. For that reason, it must be the better game! SSX Tricky is an AMAZING game that kept my younger self entertained for weeks and weeks and weeks at a time, but I am not certain if it matches up with SSX 3, personally. I suppose I'll start off by discussing the features both games have in common.

SSX Tricky and SSX 3 both offer 2 main types of single and multiplayer player modes: Race and Showoff/Freestyle (Showoff  in Tricky and Freestyle in 3. They're the same thing.) Race mode has you blasting down huge snowy mountains as fast as you can in an attempt to get from the beginning of the course to the end of the course in less time than it takes your opponent. That's how a race works. Showoff/Freestyle is a mode where you basically have the entire course as your own personal skatepark. You start at the top of whatever course you want, and try to score as many points as you can by doing all sorts of different crazy tricks before you cross the finish line. Each game has several different courses to board on. Each game has an upgrading system where you will get to choose which of your rider's stats you wish to increase, and the abundance of these opportunities increases depending on how brutally you kick your opponent's ass during the race. There are many different boards with all different stats for you to unlock AND there are different clothing options for each character that are purely cosmetic.

So both games have the same basic formula. And I'm not kidding, like, they are pretty much the same idea. Same equation and formula. No risk taken from Tricky to 3. This presents us with a unique opportunity where we can just literally compare the two games track by track, move by move. It's not like comparing Super Smash Bros. Melee's Adventure Mode to Brawl's Subspace Emissary, where they are completely different but are forced to be compared. SSX Tricky and SSX 3 have so much in common that it is incredibly easy and natural feeling to compare the two. It is a case like Minute Maid lemonade vs. Country Time lemonade where we can just say "This is better because I like it more." So. Obviously the games aren't EXACTLY the same, they just function the same. They look different, feel different, and play differently despite their concepts being akin. So we only have a couple of different things to compare, and a side by side comparison would be most efficient.

Let's start with the characters. Pretty much the same characters give or take a few newbies added to SSX 3 from SSX Tricky. Personally, I feel that the updated graphics that come with a game being newer does wonders for the SSX 3 character roster. It looks better since it is the same art style, and because it is newer. Visual appeal goes to SSX 3. Also, IM SORRY, but as much as everyone loved the announcer (Rozell?) in Tricky, SSX 3 has a real soundtrack complete with the auto-synching feature. Which means like, if in these rock songs, normally, there is a quiet section, then that quiet section is going to be played while you're in a dark cave. Then once you come shooting out of that cave, the chorus of that song is going to slam through the TV speakers, and the best part of the song is going to be pumping through while you're high in the air about to land and shit all over your opponents. Like how music is in a cheesy summer-movie made in the 90s? That's what SSX 3 does. Sound goes to SSX 3 as well.

Courses. Perhaps the tracks in SSX Tricky are more memorable. Maybe this is the result of nostalgia or because I've spent more hours total playing Tricky when compared to 3. I do feel that there was less emphasis on the course designs in 3. They don't feel lazy, in fact, they really are awesome. But, like, for example, the name of each course in SSX Tricky is blown thrown the TV speakers every time you select one. In SSX 3, they are not. And because in SSX 3, you can technically access a majority of the courses from an open-world-ish hub, you may play many courses without even knowing their names. Perhaps what I am trying to avoid saying is that even though the courses in SSX 3 are really damn fun, they do all kind of look the same - just a bunch of snow and a bunch of ramps. Fun, but I mean, Tricky has Tokyo Megaplex on its side....courses go to Tricky.

Finally, with a 1 to 1 score, we have how the game feels. Tricky does an amazing job of incorporating the element of doing tricks with the controls that can feel button-mashy but work, into a game that is not necessarily always about doing tricks. Maybe you'll want to tone the showoff inside of you down while you're ripping through tougher courses in SSX Tricky. This is because in Tricky, accidentally performing tricks you never wanted to do happens often and can REALLY fuck you up. It is very easy to accidentally stop performing your front flips (for example) while you're upside down. So like, you're blasting through a course, and a surprise ramp pops up from out of no where. Because you didn't see the ramp until it was too late, you're still holding up on the control stick, because holding up on the control stick makes you accelerate when you're on the ground. BUT in the air, holding up makes you flip, kinda. So before you know it, you're upside down, you're in the air, and you're about to eat shit and once you do, it's over. Time to press Restart. SSX 3 completely fixed this problem. In SSX 3, you automatically complete your flips every time they are executed. It's like the bottom of your board is magnetized to the snow. It makes doing double front flips on flat ground possible, but who cares how unrealistic that is? If you're going to spam tricks all day during the race, you're going to lose anyway. The point is that SSX 3 has solved the one problem SSX Tricky had with its trick system- you pretty much automatically land them every time. You still have to avoid hitting trees and stuff, but there is no bullshit when doing the tricks; each one can be performed with confidence. With the installation of SSX 3, the SSX series has finally worked out every kink in the system that links doing tricks to going fast, and for that, SSX 3 takes the best-feeling trophy.

Looks like SSX 3 wins 2 to 1. Of course, this is all just my opinion. I cannot discredit the volunteer opinions of my friends - SSX Tricky MUST be an awesome game since so many people always want to play it when they see that it is in my library. I couldn't resist getting the sequel because I was curious, but perhaps some of you may join my side one day. SSX 3 I do believe is only 5 or so dollars on Amazon. Enjoy, and don't forget that whether it is in a game or in real life, yellow snow is piss. Don't eat it.

Playground Series: This Shit Is Bananas

I've recently learned to stop apologizing. So EXCUSE my bitch ass for not posting for a bit.

P.N.03

Okay so you know how when a game comes out people are all like "wahhh imma go check IGN anf fuckong.. Gameinformersomeshit fuckin'...askn all ma frendzz an whatev see hoiw good the gmae is befo I spend moneuy err whatev" I say FUCK THAT. In order to know how good a game is, you have to play it yourself. And no game has taught me that lesson more thoroughly than P.N.03.

P.N.03 is a third-person shooter that gives off a classic arcade-like feel. You navigate through linear levels and just try to fucking kill everything in your path before they kill you. Once you reach the end of the level, you move on to the next level. The point of the game is to beat every level and once you do, you're expected to move onto the next difficulty. This game's concept is simple and during this day and age, it could appear to be outdated and stale. This game was reviewed poorly and was criticized for it's sloppy controls, small move-set, length, and gameplay. Well you know what I say? Wanna know what I think about these claims? I think FUCK. THAT. This game is AWESOME. It's so frustratingly difficult, but rewarding and even though it only takes you 2 hours to beat the story on Easy mode, it will take you a lot longer than 2 hours to earn the ultimate prize.

So we gotta talk about all the different aspects of the game that make it what it is. Like I said, P.N.03 is pretty much a level-based action game. You start in one "room", kill all of the enemies, then move onto the next room. Once you complete every room, the level ends and you are pushed to the next one. Easy right? NO. So first of all, what you need to understand in order to play this game is that even though, yes, it is a shooter, there is only 1 or 2 buttons that make you shoot. You got the A button, which unleashes the rage of your trusty Palm Shot, and different combinations of the D-pad buttons + A for your strongest attacks. Knowing when to use your 2 different shots is important but what is even more important is knowing that every other button, including, B, L, R, LL, RR, Z and Y are all different buttons that let you dodge in different ways. The point is that health and energy necessary to charge your strongest attacks is scarce and if you fuck up, the game is not going to forgive you. Every single bit of your health counts so the skill you need to master in order to beat this game is not shooting the enemies, rather it is dodging the enemies, because you better believe that if you're trying to kill these enemies, then they are trying to kill you.
 
Imagine each room is like a spacious, in-door paintball arena. There are sections of the room where you are out in the open, as well as sections where you can jump and duck behind things. Using the environment in order effectively avoid the enemy onslaught while picking off each enemy one by one is critical in order to beat, or even play this game. The incentive to avoiding every single bullet shot at you, in addition to not dying, is the fact that the game awards you a certain amount of points each time you complete a room, and then gives you a nice bonus each time you complete a level. Wow points? Like fuckin....Super Mario Bros. or some shit? Yeah points. Obviously, whenever someone hears the word "points", they think of older games. Points, and trying to achieve the greatest amount of them, is a personal goal. In Mario Bros, you aren't rewarded for getting a high score with some kinda fuckin power up or something, you were just supposed to feel good about getting more points than ya friends. P.N.03 tries to rekindle that desire to snag the most points and does it flawlessly.....not satisfied are you? Okay, you got me. P.N.03 does definitely give you incentive to earn points, but not in order to fulfill any video game goal, but to fulfill you sexual goals. Yup I said it. So lemme explain this shit. You see the points given to you at the end of each room and level is the currency in P.N.03. You can exchange the points you've earned in order to upgrade your suit, increase your health, or buy different suits. The specs of your suit, predictably, affect how quickly you are able to vanquish enemies during levels, thus making it easier for you to beat the game faster. The amount of points earned at the end of each room is determined by how quickly you completed the room, as well as how much damage you took. Then the bonus at the end of the level is determined by your average performance during each room. So where is the sex? Well what if I told you that the character you play as was a woman? What if I said she was curvy? and sexy? What if I said that while you're standing there idle on the screen, and pretty much whenever she is not jumping or rolling around, she is shaking her ass right in your face? What if I said that if you earned a fuckload of points over time, and purchased every suit, and upgraded every suit, and completed the game, that you would get the final suit: Vanessa in her underwear. Yeah I'm a fucking pig, whatever. It's funny! Think about it: the ultimate, final suit as a reward for beating the game, leaving no stone unturned and no enemy alive, is just porn. It's amazing and kicks the shit out of earning any Trophy nowadays.

This game has an insane learning curve, but it's not hard, it's just untraditional. I know when I used to play Halo 3 with my brother, I would head out and if I got shot, fucking, whatever I didn't care. You just run away, get your health back automatically and then you can go out and shoot again (I am not good at Halo). In P.N.03, if you just run out there and not give a shit, then you're gonna die in like, actually 5 seconds. You have to be stealthy and attentive. You have to learn how to use all of your different dodging techniques in order to avoid fucking EVERYTHING. I remember I definitely just ran out into the open field first thing when I turned on this game and I got pwned. I looked at the screen and I was like "...ffffuckn whaaa??" So I reconsidered my strategy, and learned how to play the game the right way. Ultimately, the fact that this shooter was so different than anything I had ever played before gave me confidence in games that try to teach an old dog new tricks. Not every game can do it, but some, very few, can. And among those games that successfully tackle familiar game genres in untraditional ways is, in my opinion, P.N.03.